Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
