I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
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