no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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