Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
