How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
