It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Randomize
