so explain again why im purple
no
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
