Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
My pussy is not your playground.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
