physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i think i have herpe
just one?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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