between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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