theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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