Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
