girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
be right there i have to get my cape
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
