if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
