I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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