it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
