i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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