It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
