I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
