Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
