dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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