Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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