so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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