I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It's blow job season.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
