if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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