This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
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