Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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