when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
i out mim tonsoeep
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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