I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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