apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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