Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Randomize
