yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
