the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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