do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Your shirt... Was in my pants
My butt remains clenched, sir.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize