Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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