only you would photoshop your dick
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
