This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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