it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
