Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
