Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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