when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I pour the whiskey from now on
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
