He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
me + whiskey = a bad person
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
