just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
bring money and cleavage
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
