that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
