sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
