what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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