I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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