Hey man sorry I got all grabby
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
