I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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