it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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